a letter to my children

Isaac, Aniyah, and Ezra
You must know, as I start this letter, that you have been loved long before we even knew you. It is so evident to us that God clearly knit our family together in such a precise and beautiful way. He is a master at making all things beautiful, and he is especially good at being faithful to His children through it all. As much as Abi and I love you three, the extravagant, never-ending, all-consuming love of your Father in heaven far exceeds anything our little minds could ever try to conceive. My prayer is that even from a young age, you will know the deep and true love of your Father who knit you together so intricately. I pray this over you daily. His love is good and pure. I pray you will seek hard after Him, because, my dears, He is not far off and He will be found. Draw near to Him and He will draw near to you. At the same time, I pray you have a holy fear of our God who spoke the cosmos into being. Who breathed life into Adam. Who causes the rain to fall on the just and the unjust alike. We serve a mighty God, He is good, but He is not a teddy-bear or old-man-grandfather that we go to with our "pleases". He is holy!  And He alone is worthy of our praises and affections.
And this is why I must tell you that you are not the center of my life. You cannot ever be that. God will always be there, He must, or things will surely fall apart. I cannot love you unless I am loving God so fully that you then get the overflow of my love. If I am not in daily surrender to our God, then I will live for myself and you simply do not want that, trust me. Self-centered Emayah is not pretty. Here's a quote from CT Studd "Only one life, twill soon be past, only what's done for Christ will last." You probably haven't even noticed (because you can't read yet) but this quote is on a piece of paper on our kitchen door going out to the garage. I see it every day. And, although I am still rather young, it is so true that these days are fleeting, they go so so quickly. Somehow, Isaac, you are already 5!  Aniyah, you are halfway to 3!  and Ezra, you are only 5 months away from your first birthday! So, I will do all I can to ensure you have a safe and *happy* childhood, but my goal is not to make you happy. If I did that, I fear, I would utterly fail each of you. You would be rotten and likely rather entitled. So, I don't aim for your happiness, but I aim to teach you and lead you to Jesus, because He is more than enough, He is all we need. He is the reason we live and move and have our being!
And so this is why I am writing, to tell you that Abi and I have prayerfully, over the course of the past several years, counted the cost, and decided to move to Burkina Faso, West Africa. We have told you this much, Isaac, and you and Abi just returned from a trip there. Aniyah and Ezra, you are still too young to understand. But we are moving our family there because we believe in what Jesus said, and we love Him and want to obey what He says to do, and that being to go and make disciples. To love others first before ourselves. To share with those who have none. To take up our cross and follow Him. We believe this. And we are people of not only conviction but action, because faith without works is dead. If we simply profess that Jesus is Lord, then we are no better off than demons who profess the same. We will follow.
What does this mean for you? I trust it means that you will be richer for it in this life we are living as a family. You will see the world, people, and the Gospel with new eyes. You will learn French and probably Jula. You will experience heart-ache at such a young age as we move to a new continent, leaving behind all that you have known and loved in your young life. You will mourn, each in your own way. Life is so full of transitions, losses, but also so full of joy in new possibilities, new adventures, new friends and communities and homes. We will walk together though all we are feeling and thinking as we leave Muskogee. But, I know, you will be totally okay in the end. I know this because I trust the God who created you. That He loves and cares for you more than I ever could. That you are HIS. I will do all I can to love you and take care of you, protect you from harm, raise you to be bold and yet humble, strong and yet mild, kind and compassionate, loving and fierce. And we will do it in Burkina, until the Lord tells us otherwise. We will take malaria medicine, we will go without a lot of things that we are used to here, we will probably get sick, we will be home sick for sure, we will be hot, sweaty, tired. But we will be richer for it! We will experience life that is truly life as we share the Gospel with our neighbors and friends who have never heard the name of Jesus. You will play soccer, play in the rain, eat crazy foods, be homeschooled (yay and sorry), travel the world, be bilingual. I just cannot wait to see where God takes us, how He provides for us, and how He will bring us so much joy that we can't even begin to understand here.
I love you three kids so much. To the core of the Earth and all the way to the farthest star and back again. I love you I love you I love you!  You bring me so much joy!
Emayah